Walk a Little While in My Shoes
by CarolMarie Smith, Chaplain and Ministries Coordinator for the
Iris B. Vest Widows Ministry Center, Sevierville, TN

The Story of Naomi

Throughout the Bible over 120 scriptures are dedicated to widows. From Genesis to Revelation, God’s people are commanded to care for and honor the widow. God shares warnings and commands us to not afflict them or put them down (Exodus 22:22-24). He also gives us great promises concerning her. God makes statements such as “He is married to the widow” (Isaiah 54:4, 5); that He certainly hears her cry (Exodus 22:23); He will establish the boundaries (borders) of the widow (Proverbs 15:25); that there is a harvest assigned for her to glean” (Ruth 2); and that pure religion He accepts as undefiled includes visiting her (James 1:27).

When we do what He says, “all the works of our hands” can be blessed (Deuteronomy 14:29) and the gospel will spread and be multiplied (Acts 6:1-7). With that in mind, as believers we need to understand the heart of the widow, the anointing God has placed on her life, and how we can fulfill the mandate He has given us.

In the Book of Ruth, we see three examples of widows. We can see the opportunities that were open to them, the choices they made and how generations were affected by their lives. Today, let us look at the life of Naomi.

Have you heard sermons that spoke of Naomi as being negative and bitter? I, myself, wondered when she returned to Bethlehem-Judah and the people greeted her, why her response was so harsh. I wondered until I was widowed and experienced some of the pain she did.

Have you ever looked at another and wondered why they have acted a certain way or said things that didn’t make sense to you? Maybe you have judged them or even felt they received their just rewards for their lifestyle or actions. Jesus told us to do for others, as we would want them to do for us. He also told us that with the same measure we judge others we will be judged. Oh my! No wonder the Indian proverb says “walk a mile in my shoes.” Let’s look at the life of Naomi and walk a little while in her shoes and see what we can learn.

The story starts out in Ruth chapter one. There was a famine in the land of Bethlehem-Judah and her husband, Elimelech, decided to take the family to Moab. In studying Jewish history, I found that Elimelech functioned as a chief in Judah and was a man of means. Elimelech was from the tribe of Judah (the worshipers) and he and Naomi were very influential. Naomi backs this up with her statement in Ruth 1:21 when she tells the people of the city, “I went out full, and the Lord has brought me home again empty” (NKJV). The Hebrew word, “mala,” used here for “full” can also be translated “satisfied, whole or complete.” Some scholars feel that Elimelech took his wealth to Moab where there was no famine, instead of sticking it out in Bethlehem-Judah like the others, to avoid failure and loss.

Let’s pick up the story in Ruth 1:3-6.

“And Elimelech Naomi’s husband died; and she was left, and her two sons. And they took them wives of the women of Moab; the name of the one was Orpah, and the name of the other Ruth: and they dwelled there about ten years. And Mahlon and Chilion died also both of them; and the woman was left of her two sons and her husband. Then she arose with her daughters in law, that she might return from the country of Moab: for she had heard in the country of Moab how that the Lord had visited his people in giving them bread” (KJV, emphasis added).

The word “left” used here is “sha’ar” from the Hebrew. It means “remain, remnant, reserve.” It renders a sense of purpose, compared with the other Hebrew word that can also be translated “left” which does not show purpose. First she was “left” by her husband. Later she was “left” by her sons as well. It is understandable that she might feel a sense of purpose when she remained with two unmarried sons. But, after the boys married and then died also, the same Hebrew word was still used, determining that there was still a work for her to do.

Later in the story, according to her reactions and the fact that she blames God for her misfortune, Naomi does not recognize she has a purpose nor feels she has any value. Naomi is walking in shoes of loneliness and mourning and greatly needs healing.

In understanding the principles of grief, when there are several losses or tragedies in a person’s life, it is called “complicated grief.” The effects can be compounded and intensified. Denial and anger are two of the normal stages of grief we see Naomi experiencing, but increased because of the multitude of losses. The city asked (Ruth 1:19-20), “‘Is this Naomi?’ And she said unto them, ‘Call me not Naomi, call me Mara: for the Almighty hath dealt very bitterly with me’” (KJV).

The name Naomi means “pleasant, delight (joy), grace and beauty.” Mara means “angry, bitter, chafed, and greatly discontented.” Naomi is saying here, “Don’t call me pleasant and delightful. I do not have joy, in fact, I am angry and bitter!” (CarolMarie’s translation).

Naomi has not only lost her husband but also both sons. She had left her home of Bethlehem where she had friends, prestige and position to go to a strange land where most likely she knew no one. They were going to just visit (sojourn) but ended up living there ten years or more. Now she is empty. The Hebrew word used in Ruth 1:21 describing her emptiness is “reyqam” (pronounced ray-kawm’). It means, “empty, ineffectually, undeservedly, without cause, in vain and void.” She is wearing shoes that are deficient in purpose and is walking in shame and reproach. She is hurting and feels she has nothing to give!

Naomi is not isolated! In the United States alone, according to US Censes, there are over 12 million widows. It is estimated that 750,000 to 800,000 join this statistic yearly. One half of the widows 65 years old or older live on $550 a month or less. (That is for rent, utilities, food, medication, insurance, car, gas and everything else). When we travel around the world, the numbers tremendously increase and the need amplifies! There are many that are empty and void of purpose in our churches and communities.

When a woman is widowed from the death of her mate, everything in her life changes. Everything! Seventy-five percent of her friendships are affected. The relationships even within her family are looked on differently. The shoes of loneliness in many cases are unbearable.

In the midst of her emptiness, scripture says, Naomi heard that the Lord had visited His people. Hope came to her through the word she received! “For the word that God speaks is alive and full of power [making it active, operative, energizing and effective]…” (Hebrews 4:12a, AMP).

“So then faith cometh by hearing, and hearing by the word of God” (Romans 10:17, KJV). “Now faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen” (Hebrews 11:1, KJV).

The word “visited” is “paqad” (pronounced paw-kad’). It means “to oversee, care for, deposit, appoint and remember.” Has your bank account ever been empty and you needed a deposit? Naomi’s life was in the red and she greatly needed God to deposit into her emotionally, spiritually, socially, and physically! She needed to be cared for and appointed a new purpose!

Isaiah 54:4-6

⁴ "Do not fear, for you will not be ashamed; neither be disgraced, for you will not be put to shame; for you will forget the shame of your youth, and will not remember the reproach of your widowhood anymore. 5 For your Maker is your husband, the Lord of hosts is His name; and your Redeemer is the Holy One of Israel; He is called the God of the whole earth. 6 For the Lord has called you like a woman forsaken and grieved in spirit…” (NKJV).

Have you ever had to face your past and felt embarrassment and shame? She did not know what we know, that God had a plan for them to find Ruth in Moab, to bring her into the lineage of David and also Jesus Christ. Naomi had to face her past in order to move into her future. It is the same principle today!

“She arose with her daughters in law, that she might return…for she had heard…” (Ruth 1:6). Naomi was not alone on this journey. One of the strategies of the enemy is to isolate the widow. She started this journey with two other widows. Ruth pulled purpose from Naomi. She cared for her and helped Naomi find new value for this season of her life, though she was grieving herself. Ruth helped Naomi want to arise. She created the desire for lifts in her shoes!

Naomi made the choice and “she arose.” Naomi put on her new shoes, shoes of hope! The word, “arose” comes from the Hebrew “quwm” (pronounced koom). It means “to rise, abide, accomplish, be clearer, confirm, continue, decree, help, lift up (again), make (establish, (make to) stand (up), stir up, strengthen, succeed.” Note that as she chose to return, it became clearer. It established and strengthened her. It has been said, “It is easier to stir a moving car than a parked one!” She heard, and then she arose.

She did not have all the answers, but was willing to go. She decided to return to Bethlehem-Judah. Bethlehem means “House of Bread” and Judah means “praise.” Naomi did not feel like praising, she told us that when she exclaimed that she was bitter and angry. But, she was willing to move toward it, for she knew that it held life for her. Naomi had assessed her life and found she was empty. She needed God to visit her! God inhabits praise. Naomi may not have been ready to put on her dancing shoes, but she was willing to move towards the ballroom. Naomi started where she could.

In Ruth 1:8-9 she blesses both Orpha and Ruth for the kindness they had shown her. Praise starts with a thankful heart. She may have been mad and hurting, but she was thankful for their kindness to her and her boys.

Later in Ruth 4:13-17, Ruth and Boaz marry. The emptiness of Naomi’s life is filled through the birth of Obed. Obed is credited to Naomi, as she becomes his nurse. It is declared that he would restore her life, nourish and support her in her old age. God had visited her even beyond what she had expected. I believe it was in her willingness to give thanks and pour into Ruth that set into motion Naomi’s needs to be met.

Our churches and communities are full of empty people that need a visit from God as well. Naomi heard words of hope. If we can understand the pain the widow has experienced, by walking a little while in their shoes, we will be able to deposit hope into her life. As we care for her, then we are truly the body of Christ, His ambassadors here on this earth! As we show acts of kindness, it will stir up gratefulness, which can open the door to praise and worship!

Orpha did not continue the journey with Ruth and Naomi, though she had equal opportunity. Orpha’s name means “stiff-necked.” According to Jewish history (www.jewishencyclopedia.com), Orpha became the mother of Goliath who also was stiff-necked and defiant. Ruth’s name means “neighbor and friend.” She was the mother of Obed whose name means “worshiper and servant’s heart.” Obed was the grandfather of David who was a man after God’s heart. Through David, worship defeated rebellion and stiff-neckness. Orpha returned to her gods and Naomi returned to the true and living God. Ruth left her gods and made commitment to the God of Naomi. Ruth decided to walk in the shoes of her mentor and they carried her into life. The shoes we choose not only affect our lives but that of our descendants.

James 1:27 tells us, “Pure religion (worship) and undefiled before God and the Father is this, to visit (inspect, to select, to go to see, look out for and relieve) the fatherless and widows in their affliction, (and) to keep himself unspotted from the world.” (Note that the word “and” is not in the original text. The words describing “religion” and “visit” are from the Greek showing the alternative translation and meaning.)

I want to offer the kind of worship that is undefiled before God, the kind the Father says is pure and that He accepts. It will keep me unpolluted from the world! It comes by putting on shoes of obedience to the word!

PRAYER:

“Lord, I yield myself to offer pure worship to you. Lead me to the widow. Give me listening ears and an understanding heart. Show me acts of kindness I can do that will stir gratefulness within her to help her in her journey of healing and to invite Your presence. Help me pull purpose from her and see the borders for harvest be established through her prayers. I praise You that You certainly hear her cry and that You are married to the widow. Lord, help us as the church, to connect with the widow’s prayers and together glean the harvest! As we are obedient to Your word, may all the works of our hands be blessed and the gospel be spread around the world! In Jesus’ name, Amen!”

SUGGESTIONS FOR THIS STUDY:

1. Have each person wear her most unusual shoes to the meeting. Use it as an icebreaker when they first arrive.
2. Decorate the room and tables with different shoes
3. Use graphics or clip art of shoes on flyers or invitations to invite the ladies to the study.
4. Make your nametags in the shape of shoes for them to keep. Write: “Walk a Little While in My Shoes” near the sole.
5. This study can be one to learn compassion, benevolence, the path of blessing, understanding Widows Ministry, start “Titus 2 mentoring”, etc. Make copies of the study for all.
6. End with a luncheon. Assign widows with other women in your church. This allows them opportunity to connect and opens great blessing for them both. Have them sit together. The Hebrew word for widow means “deficient or lacking” a husband. Psalm 68:6 says that God sets the lonely in families! Let Him do it through you!
7. Have each lady share an experience about their lives and the shoes they have walked in. When they leave, they can exchange nametags so that they can cover their “souls” in prayer.

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